Sleeping weasley

[sake1]

Sleeping…Weasley?
Harry potter belongs to J.K. Rowling. I don’t. All things are hers blah, blah. Oh one person is mine. Eve is mine! This was my first Fiction. Be kind.

Ron was walking around at King’s cross. His parents had dropped him off there with Ginny because they needed to go screw-Er- work.
“Ron where are we going?”
“Foooooood!”
“Ron, The train!”
“Later, food now!”
“Loser brother.”
“Shut up woman.”
Ron found a McDonalds and walked to the counter. A girl with long pink hair tied back in a pig tale raise an eyebrow at them. On her hat it had a pin of the United States. Kids in robs and pushing carts. < More weirdoes today.> on her Name tag it said “EVE”. She forced a smile.
“Welcome to McDonalds may I take your order?”
“Food!”
“Well yes sir we serve food. But which one do you want?”
“Freedom fries!” Her smile twitched.
“In England they are called ‘chips’.”
“I know that you American git!”
“What’d you call me?”
“A git!” Ginny piped up.
“That’s it bitch!” Eve jumped over the counter and drew a Shank out of no where. “Let’s go kid!”
(Shank: a really big Knife!)
“I’m a wizard. Can’t mess with me!” Ron pushed her over with his wand and toke his fries. The girl got up and ran after him.
Ron was waving to Harry when Eve tackled him.
“You got to pay for those!” She twisted his arm.
“Back off!” Ron bucked.
“Um…” Harry blushed.
“Harry!” Ginny walked over to him forgetting her brother.
Then Hermione popped out of no where.
“Miss! You shouldn’t hurt costumers!”
“He stole the French fries!”
“Their Chips in England.” Ginny reminded her.
“And in America they are Freedom Fries.” Hermione reported.
“I’ll call them French fries if I want!”
“None the less hurting Ron won’t help you!” Harry nodded.
“Does someone money for the fries?”
They looked at each other.
“No.” Hermone lied.
“Nope” Harry shrugged.
“I got a sickle and a button!” Ginny smiled.
Ron gowned. “Some friends you are!”
“Silence you!” Eve bites his arm.
“ACK! RAID! RAID!” Ron yelled.
“Ron, darling it’s rape not Raid.” Hermone reported.
“Oh… ACK! RAPE! RAPE!” Ron screamed.
“Weasley’s into S and M?” Melfoy questioned.
“Fuck off!” Ron screamed.
“No thank you Weasley I’m a pimp. I have Crab and Goryl. Only 200 a blow job, interested Potter?”
“Maybe later.” Harry waved Draco off.
“Pay for the damn food!” the girl wailed.
“No!” Ron Yelled.
“Then I’ll Curse you!”
“WHAT!?” Everyone said
“You can’t!” Hermone reported.
“Watch me!” She cleared her through. “True and beautiful you maybe but!” Dramatic pause! “In three hours you will prick your finger on a frigid bitch and DIE!” Eve went skipping off.
“Shit!” Ron spat.
“It’s not a real curse is it Hem?” Harry asked.
“Well…Yes.”
“Shit!” Ron spat again.
“Let’s make the most of Ronnie’s last hours!” Screamed Ginny.
“Alright for a dying man Crab will be One Sickle.” Draco smiled.
“Fuck off!”
“A ray of hope there still my be, in the gift I give to thee.” Hermone begin. “Prick your finger on a bitch but instead of dying you will only sleep until true loves first kiss awakens you!”
“… You’ve seen sleeping beauty to many times.” Harry said.
“Shut up!”
~~~~~time passes~~~~~~~~
Ron and everybody are at school. (Yaw!) And the damned hat is done sing and everyone’s eating.
“Food!” Ron screamed.
“Why didn’t you pay the woman?”
“Fuck off Hem!”
Crab came walking over in drag. “Ron, My pimp says I can sleep with you for one sickle cuz you’re dying.”
Ron made a face. “Um… Harry?”
Harry toke Crab on his lap. “Here be with me hot cheeks.”
“Harry!” Crab giggle.
“Honestly you boys!” Hermone turned to yell when she brushed Ron. She “pricked him”.
“FUCK!” Ron fell over.
“…Opps I did it again.” Hermone said.

~~~ End chapter one

[sake1]

Ch. 2!

Ron was in the Medical wing with his friends around him.
“You frigid pregnant dog!” Harry slapped Hermone.
“Shut up fruitcake!”
“My fetish isn’t any of your concern!” Harry looked hurt.
“Well if you weren’t flirting with crab this would have never happened!”
“No if you would have paid for his damn fries this would have never happened!”
“Fuck off!”
“No you!” The two go in to sissy slapping fits. When Dumbledore comes in with smoke behind him and Bob Marle music.
“Wazzzzzzzup pregnant doges?” He said
“Head master?” Harry choked.
“Nah fool it’s HeadMazter ya’ll know?”
“Ghetto headmaster?” Hermone questioned.
“Word!” He did a arm cross.
“That’s just messed up.” Hermione sighed.
“What it is pregnant dogez?”
“Um…Ron has the whole sleeping beauty cures.” Harry said.
“Fuck no! Man I’m out of here.” He went back to his office to smoke more.
“Well, let’s find Ron’s true love.” Harry said.
“Fine.”
“You first Hermone!”
“Fine!”
She bent over and kissed Ron on the lips. Nothing happened.
“Not me.”
“Course not! Your frigid!”
“Screw you!”
Harry bent down and kissed Ron. Nothing happened.
“Good for a minuet I thought the author was really off her rocker.” He laughed.
“Don’t hope. It’s going to be really twisted.”
“Damn!” Harry hit his head.
So Harry and Hermone started paying everyone in the school to kiss Ron. All but Crab, Goryl, and Draco.
“Potter you’ll need more money then that for both my pregnant doges to kiss a dead guy!” Draco pushed him.
“He’s sleeping git!” Harry said.
“Can we Draco daddy?” Crab whined
“Yeah can we?” Goryl agreed.
“Fine go.”
They both kissed Ron yet nothing happened.
“Damn!”
Just then all of Ron’s family showed up.
“I called them!” Ginny reported.
First Ron’s mom kissed him. Nothing.
His Dad. Nothing. Then his brothers. Still nothing. Then Granny Weasley came forward.
“Give me some sugar.” And she pressed her gross lips to his. Still nothing.
“Let’s get the professor’s to do it!”
“Yaw!” They all cheered. It had become some kind of entertainment. Soon all the teachers came and kissed him. Nothing. Then they called every one Ron had ever met. Still dead.
“We’re doomed!” Hermone cried.
“He’s more frigid then you!” Harry cried.
Just then Draco came in a cute little prince outfit. Light blue with a purple cape. Puffy shorts and everything!
“Draco?” Harry asked.
“Yeah? Well With this whole thing going on no one pays for my pregnant doges! I’ve come to end this damned fiction!”
“What make you think it’s you?” Hermone asked.
“It’s twisted that's why!”
“Alright go to work!” Harry pulled out a camera.
“Wait let’s do this right! Someone find a pink dress!” Hermione screamed. After getting Ron in drag they set a seen. They put him on a bed of roses and set up some sappy music. Everyone was there. They also watched Sleeping beauty o get in to the mood. Draco leaned forward. Everyone held his or her breath. Draco Frenched Ron. Who woke with a start.
“ACK! RAID! RAID!”
“Rape, git.” Draco sighed. And everyone made them get married.

The end!

Twisted? Yes!

[RyanGray]

I appreciated looking at your article. Very wonderful reveal. I would like to twit this on my followers. Many thanks!
homeprio.com/